This is all especially spot on. Thank you for reading and commenting. My girlfriend is on the lower end of the BMI spectrum. But that's not why we're long-term partners, of course.

There's quite a bit of science that shows that what you say is true (I'm slowly working on a piece for it on The Science of Sex on Substack)—women judge women far more harshly than they judge men, and men judge men far more harshly than they judge women. This is especially true with younger people who are in a "competitive mode" with "competitive orientations" in order to seek and find sex partners or life partners.

Of course they're going to be critical of their competition!